So I will be honest and share with you I had a bad day. Yes, it was bound to happen. Nothing specifically bad happened. I just was missing the "little things" of home. I kept thinking how I missed our:
Our families. Our friends. Fridays with Leah. Spontaneous lunches with Kelly. Cousin's birthday parties. Worshipping at Tulsa Bible Church. The nursery and Sunday school at TBC. Victory Mom's Day Out. Did I mention our family and friends? I could almost taste a Sonic Cherry Limeade. Being able to call Kyle on the way home and say, "It's been a hard day. Could you stop and bring something home for dinner?". Getting in a car and going to Wal-Mart when I run out of something. Hot water. Consistent electricity. Knowing that all those I loved I could reach by phone anytime. Or better yet just a short drive away. Dates with Kyle and the list could go on.
So then I remembered the "little things" I love here:
The beauty I see of God's creation from every window of my house. Watching my kids' imaginations flourish as they learn to live with minimum. Watching my kids' make friends in a culture that finds joy even in the midst of great poverty. Afternoons with Edna as we laugh together and share openly and honestly the deeper things of the heart. Getting to have breakfast, lunch and dinner with Kyle everyday. Sending Hudson off to the hospital all by himself to be dad's big "assistant". Worshiping our Lord together with another tribe and tongue. Smiles from Kenyans you can see miles away. Walking up the path to buy a dozen fresh eggs. Walking a little further to buy fresh fruits. Mangos (I think of Shannon and Marlene everytime I eat one. I wish I could share one with you right now!) The elderly guy who knocks on my door and brings me fresh lemons and grapefruits straight from his "shamba" (garden) for only 2 shillings a piece. Seeing a new exotic bird everyday. Seeing the local children play outside my door making windmills out of twigs and leaves. The laughter and joy that is always present in their faces. Hearing God's miracles and handiwork from Kyle every evening as he shares about his day at the hospital. Knowing without a doubt that this is exactly where God wants my family and I to be. And all of these little things I love helped me to treasure the rest of my day and enjoy the Lord's goodness to me back at home in Oklahoma as well as my new home here in Kapsowar.
I found something the other day that warmed my heart for you. Remember IHOP and how I asked the Lord to show me things for you? Well, I found the card, and it is SO appropriate for NOW. I don't know if you still have a copy or have looked at it recently, but here is what I saw from the Lord:
"You have a heart like Mary. He sees your heart and Your desire for Him. It will not be taken from you. Keep sitting at His feet--Luke 10:41-42"
"I get a sense He wants to cultivate a holy boldness in you--both to approach Him and to declare Him. I kept hearing the word "boldness"."
The picture I had:
"A little boy in a desert town, (carefree and trusting), turning a tire with a stick down a deserted road." I sense you need to take joy in simple things when you're in a dry place. He will provide this joy for you. You can find delight even in the desert.
It brings me GREAT JOY to see this being worked out in you while you are in Kapsowar. I am so proud of you and thankful for who you are. You are a blessing. I miss you so much and love you dearly, Vanessa.
Well, I agree with all that Geidlbots said above. So beautiful!
I would say that I could go and have a cherry limeade for you, but 21 days no sugar- see even here we are trying to rid ourselves of worldly things we think we "need". Yes, they are enjoyable, but He is SO much more enjoyable!
To tailend what she said above, the scripture Adam and I posted on the fridge in January seems perfect for you as well.
"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43:18-19
Homesickness stinks- press on!
Thank you Vanessa...you have encouraged an old womans heart from across the vast ocean......
I echo your homesickness, especially all that was familiar and comfortable in Tulsa, and we're only 4 hours away. I love your list of the good things around you and it is inspiring and encouraging to me. It is beautiful here in the West Little Rock hills in the spring, blooming all over. We love you and continue to pray for you. God is using you greatly!
Because He Lives, Charlotte
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